Closing the Distance #BlogBattle Writing Challenge
Organised by Rachael Ritchey - http://www.rachaelritchey.com
Organised by Rachael Ritchey – http://www.rachaelritchey.com

#BlogBattle is a weekly writing challenge organised by Rachael Ritchey. You can find more information about itΒ here.Β It’s a fun battle, and a supportive group – a great place to hang out! The theme this week is β€˜DISTANCE’

Just a quick note before I begin. For those who’ve been following alongΒ with my story a day, I’m taking a break from Missing, but the story will return tomorrow.

Barry looked down into Phoebe’s face and felt a wave of longing. It was sweet agony to see her again, even if it was merely a dream. He knew it to be a dream because the lucidity of it was unmistakable. He also knew because had had been sharing secret conversations with her for months.

For a man with an eidetic memory, he needed an outlet and, for Barry, that outlet was to dream. He didn’t understand it, and he no longer questioned it. His mind replayed and stored an endless stream of information so, when he slept, he was able to process and analyse his reaction to the day’s events. It was a coping strategy, the reason he could start afresh in the morning without being weighed down by the past.

Phoebe started appearing in his dreams the day she left. Now their conversations were a habit, a part of his conscience with which he could interact.

With a jolt of recognition, Barry felt the change to his psyche which signalled the onset of a different dream. He waited for Phoebe’s face to disappear, for the scene to change. Something he could never control. But the scene didn’t change, not completely.

He stared into Phoebe’s eyes and saw the shadow of pain and fear at the same moment his hands settled around her throat. Her face wavered when his mind balked at the concept of hurting her. Except he wasn’t the one hurting her. He was someone else now, and if his history was any indication, this was a premonition.

β€œNo!” Barry threw himself from the dream, unable to watch as the thick, meaty hands of her attacker began to squeeze. In the vision, he had been the attacker, and the idea of it sent him into a blind panic.

He barely gave himself a minute to control the frantic beating of his heart before he was reaching for the phone and dialling. The long distance ring tone grated along frayed nerves.

Pick up. Pick up.

She normally answered on the fourth of fifth ring. He counted them in his head; his anxiety growing with each separate sound; seven, eight, nine.

β€œBarry?”

Everything stilled inside him when he heard her voice. It took a moment to find his. β€œYeah, it’s me.” He could understand her confusion, now that he was thinking clearly. In his panic he hadn’t considered the time, in fact, he hadn’t thought about the distance at all.

β€œWhat is it? Has something happened?”

β€œNo, nothing happened. Can’t I get the urge to ring you without there being a national emergency?”

β€œNot when you sound like a cat on a hot tin roof.” There was a beat or two of silence. β€œAnd your urges don’t usually strike at three in the morning.”

β€œWho’s to say which urges strike at this hour?”

She laughed, a husky sound that belonged in the bedroom. β€œI walked right into that one. I’ve missed you, Irish.”

I missed you too.

β€œYeah, it’s been a while.”

β€œAlmost twelve months.”

β€œUm hm.”

The chuckle made him smile. β€œCome on, you know you want to say it.”

β€œI have no idea what you’re talking about.”

β€œAnd I have the patience of a saint. Just do it…ball park figure.”

He snorted at that, relaxing into the game. β€œForty-three weeks, fifteen hours, nine minutes and…twenty-two seconds.”

Phoebe chuckled. β€œAh, but I’m in a different time zone-”

β€œDo you really want me to talk about time and relativity?”

β€œHoney, I could listen to that voice all day long, but I’m between jobs so you’re going to have to cut to the chase.” It disarmed him.

β€œI had a dream.”

β€œYou’ll have to be more specific.” She lowered her voice. β€œWas I in this dream?”

Her face flashed into his mind, her bulging, startled eyes. β€œYou could say that.”

β€œThen tell me.”

He did, though his throat wanted to swallow the words. When he was through, he had to ride the long and agonising silence that followed.

β€œI’m fine, Barry. I get why you called, but I’m okay.” More silence, silence he knew he was supposed to fill. β€œListen to me. I’ll be home in two weeks and you can see for yourself.”

β€œYou don’t understand, Phoebe. I have the image in my head, and it felt like me. For a second it felt like me.” He blew out a breath. β€œI know they weren’t my hands, but-”

β€œYou think it’s a future event, and that someone wants to hurt me.” Her voice held no judgement.

β€œI don’t know. I joined the scene a little late and I jumped straight back out again.”

β€œOkay, how about this. I promise I’ll be careful and stay away from men with suspicious looking hands.”

β€œIt’s not funny.”

β€œNo, it’s not, and I’m sorry it freaked you out. I know you, Irish and once you’ve analysed things you’ll figure it out.”

Barry nodded, though she couldn’t see him. β€œYou’re right. I just needed to hear your voice, that’s all.”

β€œThen I’ll call when I get home and we’ll figure it out together. Get some sleep. I’m fine, I promise.”

He relaxed. β€œI’ll talk to you soon, Red.”

That made her laugh, as he’d known it would. He could hear the indecision in her voice. She wouldn’t go until he told her it was okay.

β€œYou bet.”

Barry stared at the ceiling when she disconnected, concentrating on the constellation above his head. It was another coping strategy, a distraction. He wasn’t ready to go back into the dream. Not yet.

Only three-hundred and thirty six hours to go. Give or take.

He smiled as he threw back the covers and jumped out of bed. It was time to find another distraction, because he certainly didn’t want to sleep.


Thanks for stopping by.

Mel

28 responses to “Closing the Distance #BlogBattle Writing Challenge”

  1. Solveig Avatar

    I am now wondering if it were his own future actions he witnessed in the dream.

    1. mbarkersimpson Avatar

      No…Barry would sooner hurt himself than his friends. It was just too close to home. Phoebe is right – once he’s had a little time he’ll find the answer πŸ˜‰

      1. Solveig Avatar

        will you continue it?

      2. mbarkersimpson Avatar

        Eventually – I like the character. He fascinates me πŸ˜€

  2. Charles Yallowitz Avatar

    Very curious about what happened. πŸ™‚

    1. mbarkersimpson Avatar

      It only occurred to me when I read through it that I ended it poorly! I’m in seriel story mode and forgot this was supposed to be a one off. ‘D’oh!’ Sorry to leave you all hanging! πŸ˜€

      1. Charles Yallowitz Avatar

        Just means you have to write more at some point. πŸ˜€

      2. mbarkersimpson Avatar

        Yeah, I guess that’s no hardship! Thanks, Charles πŸ˜€

  3. Beaton Avatar

    what does a cat on a hot tin roof sound like and she we call the SPCA because can’t think of a good reason for having a cat on a hot tin roof… oh but I do know what a fiddler on the roof sounds like.

    death by suspicious looking hands nice touch haha no pun intended and it would be quite deadly touch hahaha

    ok one question, really, is the character really clairvoyant or just has bats in his head that and a really good memory, borderline stalker type memory at that
    ~B

    1. mbarkersimpson Avatar

      Bats in his head – ha! That’s funny πŸ˜€ He sometimes channels other people in his dreams – messages about a past or future event. They are rarely clear and few and far between. Thanks for the feedback – if he comes off as a stalker then I need to change it. That’s not who he is at all. It’s a joke between the characters because he generally hides his intelligence from others. Cat on a hot tin roof is an odd expression isn’t it? I guess they would be jumpy! πŸ˜€

      1. Beaton Avatar

        The stalker quality is endearing actually especially since its between friends, yes πŸ™‚

      2. mbarkersimpson Avatar

        That’s ok then! πŸ˜€ Thanks

  4. Jacqui Murray Avatar

    I can see this in a future iteration of man. Holograms, augmented reality–we’re getting close.

    1. mbarkersimpson Avatar

      It’s a scary thought! πŸ˜€

  5. cathleentownsend Avatar

    As a revision thought, if you could make it clearer that he’s channeling the assailant and not the assailant himself, that would be clearer. Right now I’m not sure which way to go as a reader. Other than that–vivid story, well told.

    1. mbarkersimpson Avatar

      Thanks, Cathleen. That’s really useful. I’ll make a note. Really glad you enjoyed it πŸ˜€

  6. Patricia Lynne (@plynne_writes) Avatar

    I wouldn’t want to sleep after that too!

    1. mbarkersimpson Avatar

      Lol! Me either πŸ˜‰

  7. thatseana Avatar

    The familiarity you created between the two characters drew me in to the drama of the story. I am also curious what happens to Red!

    1. mbarkersimpson Avatar

      Thank you. Next time I’ll try to give people a more satisfying conclusion πŸ˜‰ I don’t know where my brain was at this week!

  8. Rawls E. Fantasy Avatar

    Well written, Melissa! I like the turmoil Irish goes through. I’m worried for Phoebe now, and it ends on a cliffhanger.

    1. mbarkersimpson Avatar

      Thank you πŸ™‚ I realised too late how I ended it, and didn’t mean to leave people hanging!

  9. Carrie Ann Avatar

    πŸ™‚ Really good story…I liked the characters…Irish is very fascinating!!

    1. mbarkersimpson Avatar

      Thanks, Carrie Ann πŸ˜€ I’m glad you enjoyed it. I like Barry a lot.

  10. Rachael Ritchey Avatar

    cliffhanger or no, that was a great story! I was pleased to realize he wasn’t the perpetrator. I got worried there for a second during the dream change, but you cleared it up and I went, phew! haha

    1. mbarkersimpson Avatar

      Thanks, Rachael πŸ˜€ I’m happy you liked it. No cliffhanger next time I promise!

      1. Rachael Ritchey Avatar

        I don’t mind the cliffhangers. πŸ™‚

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I’m Melissa

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